The United States has apologized to Guatemala for a 1940s STD study that infected them with syphilis. The U.S. has 15 more trading partners to call with the bad news.

China launched an unmanned lunar probe today, another step closer to its ultimate goal of landing a man on the moon. Other ambitious projects for China include inventing the wheel and slicing bread.

Today is Nigeria’s 50th birthday. They sent out invites to the party, but most people don’t check their spam folder.

Burglars in Arizona are breaking into houses, stealing food and water, and then taking showers before they leave. Crime experts refer to it as “pulling a Randy Quaid”.

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